How do you experience empathy and its impact on you?

How do you experience empathy?

Empathy is the ability to feel, understand, and connect with the emotional experience of others. It develops through our early relationships and life experiences, and can be shaped by how safe or supported we’ve felt in the past. Some people stay open to others’ emotions, while others may disconnect or feel overwhelmed as a form of protection.

This exercise can help you explore how you relate to others emotionally. There are no right or wrong answers. Just choose the option that feels most accurate for you in each group.

1. Feeling others' emotions

A. I can feel others’ emotions and stay present with them.
B. I sometimes feel overwhelmed or confused by others’ emotions.
C. I tend to shut down or disconnect when others are emotional.

2. Responding with care

A. I respond with warmth and care when someone is upset.
B. I want to help, but I may freeze, doubt myself, or not know what to say.
C. I often feel numb, defensive, or irritated when others are struggling.

3. Holding space for others

A. I can hold space for someone else’s pain without needing to fix it or make it about me.
B. I sometimes feel unsure whether I’m doing it “right” or worry I’m not enough.
C. I find it difficult to stay present for others’ emotions and tend to withdraw.

What to do with your answers:

Look at which letter you chose most often: A, B, or C.

• Mostly A: You’re functioning from a place of emotional attunement and grounded empathy. You can be present for others without losing yourself.

• Mostly B: You’re in a space of tension. You care, but past experiences or self-doubt sometimes get in the way. Noticing this is an important step toward growth.

• Mostly C: You may have learned to protect yourself by shutting down emotionally. This might have helped in the past, but could now be limiting your ability to connect. Consider whether you're ready to explore safer ways to be emotionally present with others.