💓 MODULE 4. Emotional Regulation and Inner Safety
A quick way to feel calmer and safer
When to use it
This technique can help you feel better when you’re stressed, upset, or need a moment of peace. It’s useful in situations like:
Feeling nervous or anxious
Before an important meeting or talk
Calming down before sleeping
After hearing or remembering something upsetting
When you notice your heart beating fast or your body feeling tense
During an argument, to avoid saying or doing something you’ll regret
You don’t have to wait until you feel very bad to use it. Practicing when you are only a little uncomfortable will make it easier to use later.
How to do it
Choose your safe place
Think of a happy memory or a place, person, pet, or image that makes you feel calm and safe.
Make sure it is not connected to anything sad or negative.
Picture it in detail
Close your eyes and imagine the colors, sounds, smells, and how your body feels in that place.
Let yourself enjoy the good feeling.
Add a calming word
Choose one word to go with your image, like “peace,” “home,” or “sunlight.”
This will help you remember the feeling faster.
Repeat it
Imagine your safe place and say your calming word in your mind.
Do this 4–5 times, for about one minute each time.
Use it anytime
When you feel stressed or upset, close your eyes (if you can), think of your safe place, and say your word.
Let yourself stay there until you feel calmer
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Adapted and inspired by concepts from Shapiro, F. (2012). Getting past your past: Take control of your life with self‑help techniques from EMDR therapy. New York, NY: Rodale.
📝 Assessment activity
Practice the safe or calm place technique at least once, and then observe:
Initial activation
How your body and internal state felt before starting the practice.
Perceived change
What shifted during or after the exercise (for example: breathing, tension, internal rhythm, clarity).
Conditions of use
The types of situations in which it was easier or more difficult to access a sense of calm.
The sensation does not need to be intense or immediate. The goal is simply to notice whether the exercise introduces any degree of regulation, even if minimal.